Well, Well
2003-01-30 - 9:20 p.m.
Hmmm...
Readin' Essence tonight...came across some words from TD Jakes. He said that one thing a woman must do before searching for a mate is to sit down and figure out what makes her happy...
That made me think, "Hmmm...what makes me happy? What am I looking for to make me happy?"
I'm so mad 'cause I can't answer either of those questions. I mean I don't really know what makes me happy as far a mate is concerned.
Music - I love it. Listening to music, to the melodies, to the words...that makes me happy.
Looking up at the sky, imagining things - how I'll hold my children, sitting on a plane en route to my next destination for my beloved occupation, washing my dishes in my own home, meeting Faith Evans strictly for work purposes and telling her on the side how much "Keep the Faith" meant to me - brings me happiness.
The feeling that "everything is gonna be alright, He's coming back like he said he would" surely makes me happy.
Breathing this tropical damn air in Miami makes me happy.
Laughter makes me happy.
Smiling makes me happy.
Interacting with the people I care about makes me happy.
I get happy when I appreciate my blessings.
When I look at how different my whole entire life has been from everyone I know, I get happy.
Knowing that there is something different about me makes me happy.
Now, when I think about things this way, I have to ask myself how can a mate complete me? In what way can a mate make these things come true for me? I mean, I can't understand where the mate fits into the things that make me happy category. I'm trying to understand what a mate could add to this list. I mean, if I don't know that I want it, how can I appreciate it?
I'm confusing myself! LOL!
I need to stop looking for the answer. I don't want this to be on my mind right now. There are other, more pressing issues that should be occupying my thoughts. Enough of this.