Shake That Load Off!
2003-04-10 - 10:23 p.m.
People really try to work my last nerve sometimes. And it drives me crazy! And it's hard to remember that they will get what they deserve in the end. It really is sometimes. But I'm working on it. I really am. I really, really am.
Now that that's off my chest... LOL. I feel better. I do.
Friday is tomorrow. Thank God. I need just to see my house. I am just so sick of my school and some of the people here. I just need to go home, look at some familiar faces and lay in my damn bed! In situations like this, I just need to be in a setting that lets me know I'm safe and I don't have to guess who people are because they are who they are and I know this and there are no games being played. It just amazes me that some people have made it this far the way they are... It really does. I'm not saying I'm the cream of the freakin' crop, but damn! Really! Some people! LOL! But I'm serious!
Whoooo. I feel the tension all up in my neck! I mean all up in my neck! Four more weeks. Just four. F-O-U-R. I never thought I'd be so happy to leave somewhere.
I thought I had it off my chest...then somebody brought it back. Okay. For real this time. I'm lettin' it go.
I'm mad that my damn phone is actin' a damn fool so I have to call certain people instead of them calling me. Call me spoiled or whatever but I'm used to answering the phone, not dialing the number.
Once again, I thought I had it off my chest. I'm just gonna stop answering my damn door. Cause everytime I do, it's the same crackhead ditz rilin' me up some more!
Didn't I say the other day that everytime I think about something, that something appears? Well, as I'm sitting here attempting to calm down, the phone situation just worked out the way I wanted it to: I received a phone call instead of having to place one.
I used to be so afraid of going on dates. I guess I just didn't want to end up in a situation where I felt like I had to put on a show or whatever. I would always set it up and then back out at the last minute. I vowed that I would not do that this year. So far, I've only done it once and that was something that was out of my control.
I just set one up for Saturday. I'm actually excited about going even though it'll be cutting into the little bit of nap time I have scheduled for the weekend. :P He asked me what I wanted to do. I said, "I don't know. Just take me away." And I damn sho' meant that! He said, "Alright. I know what I'm going to do." I'm just gonna go into it with no damn expectations because, if you've been readin' me at all, you know, I can't stand being disappointed.
I don't know what I'm getting myself into. I'm just not going to think about it. For real, I'ma let it just happen. Whatever happens. I'm hoping for a friendship. That's the best I can damn do.
Goodness, I wrote more than a lil bit in my damn diary. Time to go to bed (Why have I been sayin that since 10:00pm and ain't made it there yet??!!)