Feels Just Like Heaven...
2002-06-15 - 10:57 p.m.
Hey Diary.
No song to sing today. Got Raphael Saadiq's new album but I haven't had a chance to listen to anything but "Be Here" ("I'm a good man, and I work hard on my night job!").
Last night, when I went to sleep, I felt good. I felt good because I finally realized that "He" was not the one for me. I finally accepted the FACT. I was happy when I went to sleep last night. And I was peaceful when I went to sleep last night.
But that damn phone is going to be the death of me! Wouldn't you know that the shrill woke me from a bomb-ass dream two and a half hours after I drifted off to sleep??!! In my sleepy haze, I could barely see the number on the screen...
Once I did though, I woke the hell up. "Do I answer it or just turn it off? Answer it." Yes, "He" was calling me after a month. Accusing me of being unreachable. I don't comprehend how somebody you don't try to reach is unreachable. But whatever. When I answered the phone this time, I wasn't so excited to hear His voice. My heart wasn't beating fast and I wasn't looking forward to finding out what He's been doing in the last month. I was so glad that this is my reaction to Him because it lets me know that I'm over it. Once I'm over it, there's nothing anyone can do to change my mind. So, I'm alright now.
I've been waiting for 21 years. I can wait just a little while longer...
*THANK YOU SO MUCH 'Tonio!!!*
I'm going to sleep...again. But this time, just for rest.
Goodnight Diary.