I LOVE SLEEP!!!!!!
2002-05-31 - 3:02 p.m.
Oh Diary, Oh Diary...
The minutes are CRAWLING by today! It's always like that when you're anxious. I've only been at work for an hour and a half. I only have two and a half more hours to go. But I feel like the damn time is really going slowly. I'm trying not to look at the clock but you know me�
Sometimes, I'm so tired and all I want is a little rest. I have two jobs and an internship. I enjoy working and I love staying late at the internship but, once I'm on the way home, that sleepiness hits me and I need my bed. It seems like as soon as I set aside me some time to do my other favorite activity, which is SLEEPING, somebody has to call me because they want to talk. Now I know this may seem mean but it's true. I know that I'm the person everybody is going to call when they need something because I'm always the one who takes the time out to listen.
So, last night, I'm in my bed. Said to myself, "At 11pm, you are going to sleep." Well, close to 11pm, somebody called me. She really didn't have anything to talk about. I guess she was just bored. She always calls me late at night when I'm tired as hell even though my cell phone is on allllll damn day. She can call me anytime of the day but she always calls me when I'm right on my way to sleep. And don't think she gets the hint that I'm tired when I continuously yawn through the conversation (and I don't do it on purpose to be nasty - that's just how tired I usually am), she just keeps on talking and talking. Finally got off the phone with her.
Get my Bible and close my eyes. Dreams start making their way into my head� And what do I hear??!! The doggone phone ringing. I didn't even look at the damn time cause I was trying to psyche myself out. Answered the phone cause I'm not one to be able to just let it ring. Who is it? Another girl who always calls to tell me about the drama in her life. Some people don't ever call to see how you're doing. They just call to get all their frustrations out.
At this point, I'm near death because I am so damn tired and I know I got to get up before the crack of damn dawn the next day. So I listen - ain't much I can offer as far as advice because hers is mostly self-inflicted drama. And I'm not too much in the advice-offering business anymore now that my behind got caught up in a damn relationship. So, I listen some more. Some things I really empathize with but my mind is so tired that it's hard for me to help her understand that I'm trying to feel her pain. She can sense that I'm not completely there so she says, "I'll let you go to sleep now cause I know you have to get up for work early." I thank her for her damn mercy, wish her well, and hang up.
I look at the clock and it's 1:30am! I'm so upset but I realize that these things happen� I attempt to go back to sleep. It doesn't work. So, for the rest of the damn night and most of this morning, I toss and turn, imagining the good sleep I would have had. Then, once I finally get to sleep, I gotta get up to get ready for work. Matter fact, I'm late getting up so I'm late to work, something that I absolutely abhor. (I like this damn word so I use this word.) I wish it were so easy for me to ignore that damn phone but I always think it could be an emergency so I always answer it even though I know that if it were an emergency, they would call my damn cell phone.
But I'm preaching to the choir cause it's all my fault so I'm letting it go with this journal entry.
I'm not even anticipating sleep tonight cause I heard I may be able to get into this offglass club for free (maybe even VIP - I got my fingers crossed). So, I'll be working at both of my jobs today, going to the internship, then going home and getting ready for the club. All day, I'll be thinking about the sleep I'll probably get tomorrow morning.
But that's life so�
Peace Diary.